Thursday, November 5, 2009

Didn't want to have to write this one...

I was talking to Connie and I realized that every blog that I post here seems to have a common theme and when I went to go look at the evidence, guess what? It was totally true. If you know me, I am not a very avid blogger. I like to blog occasionally. I set up this blog before coming to Taiwan with the intention of writing in it like every week. HA! I laugh because in no way did I accomplish this goal.

Okay, well, I guess a self-I-told-you-so would be in order. This is just like my journal writing habits. They are well intentioned, but in the end they peter out. I would seem that nothing happens to me here in Taiwan, when in fact many things have happened you just don't hear about them unless you are here with me.

So, on to the main point of this blog. I always post about staying here longer in Taiwan and you guessed it, I am staying here another six months in Taiwan. I had decided to finally go back to America, but I decided about a month ago to stay here longer. I will be going home for Christmas to California and then flying to visit my brother and other family and friends in Utah for New Years. And then I am coming back here to teach English at my same school.

Friday, October 30, 2009

This month I am going to embark on a journey into novel-hood. I have started novel or even one play, but I have never finished one. That is why I was so excited that someone posted this link: on Facebook. After reading it, I was so happy and excited to participate. It seems like the perfect opportunity, WOW!

I am going start tomorrow here in Taiwan. I just hope that I can keep up to par on the word count. IN the end the qualify as a winner, you have to reach 50,000 words. I am just glad those words are not an essay I have to write, rather it is a novel.

I have the Title and the basics planned out. It is called: Dying Blue or the Bird that Mocks. That is the whole title...seems kinda long and it seems like I am still trying to decide between two title, but it is really one.

I hope I can keep up the word count. It is about 1,700 words a day! I will need a lot of follow through on this one. So if I am spouting poetic or you never see me, you know why. (I guess that last comment is just for the people I live with and my friends in Taiwan)...

Well, if anyone else is interested, please check out this website:

Saturday, August 1, 2009


It has been a long time since I posted here evidently. Since April! Well, I have still living in Taiwan and have decided to stay here forever. Crazy right? My mom isn't happy about that cause I will be away longer. Only 6 months in Taiwan! HAHAHA! I laugh at that now and wonder what life would be without Taiwan. I am glad I decided a year ago not to listen to my fears and jump on the plane instead. I really would've kicked myself although I would always wonder what would've happened. Sitting at home in American living a somewhat normal boring life always thinking of what might've been. Glad I am not there.

Well, I should change my blog to another out for a change, if anyone reads my blog anymore...just kidding...but how can you read blog in which nothing is written...that might change. Change being the operative word here. No promises.

Monday, April 20, 2009

Staying Put in Taiwan

I am staying longer in Taiwan. As well as Connie! ye-whoo!!! I am going to take a short trip back to America (the motherland!) and then coming back less than a week later. I am very excited!!

Life has been good to me. I don't know how long I will be here after my 1 and 1/2 years but time will tell and I really like it here. I don't want to start my real life back in the states. What aren't I living a real life here? Yep, I would say so. I won't be here forever but for now it is quite lovely and where I want to be. Life is an adventure! Glad of that...well most of the time...some of the time...depends...on my mood or whatnot. I love Taiwan! I am glad I am staying.

There are too many I's in this here is the end.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

I Cannot Believe It!

I honestly cannot believe I have been here in Taiwan for so long: 9 months or so... The weeks have just been flying by. After I reach Tuesday my week goes so fast. It is that dang Monday that gets me all the time.

I am even thinking of staying longer here in Taiwan. I think it is the best for me right now. I honestly didn't think I would stay so long! So surprising! I like it here. I guess I don't really miss my family too much because I know they love me and support me in whatever I decided to do. It has been a real blessing being here in Taiwan and to be teaching at the same school as Connie. It has really kept my sanity. Thanks Connie. ^_^

Friday, February 13, 2009

Lost and Found In the Crowd

As I walk through the crowded night market in Fong Yuan, I find myself both lost and found in the crowd. I am surrounded by a language I cannot understand. It is actually a comfortable mute. Quiet in its noise. There is no fluid ease-dropping in progress on my end. I feel as if I were a ghost walking through a sea of people I cannot reach out and connect to. When I do catch someone's eye, I want to be invisible; it reminds me that I cannot communicate with them.

Although I cannot understand it, I am completely aware of my own thoughts. "What am I doing here?" "I don't speak any Chinese; definitely not enough to get me by?" "I am out here by myself on purpose; all I feel is lonely." "I just needed to get out." I need to get away sometimes and get lost in a crowd to realize what I have and don't have. To think about what I am doing here. Teaching English and for 7-8 months to boot. "Am I really doing this?" "And I have been thinking about staying longer....what was I thinking???" "Why don't I
just go to Russia, where I could actually speak some semblance of the language?" "I don't want to leave Taiwan just yet...I still need to learn Chinese." "Why do I care so much about learning it....?"

I hear an English song playing from a vendor who also sells marijuana paraphernalia. I laugh inside; the only thing I can understand is the music. I walk through the thoroughfares, passively looking. I have been to night markets over 20 times; I have seen most of it.

I find the bulk of the food vendors and look for my
nui pie. I find it. I almost decide to walk past it. I turn back. I wait until a vendor acknowledges me. He says something to me, but I cannot hear it. He starts speaking in the little English he knows. I say nui pie. I cannot manage to get out yo yau e ge nui pie even though I can say it. I feel so dumb and those nagging thoughts return about my ability to even learn Chinese. He asks what kind of sauce do I Chinese first and then English. I just point to the sweet sauce like a dumb monkey.

I sit down. I get out the 100 dollars I know it costs. They bring me the food and he tells me it is
e bai. Finally, I can understand: numbers!!! This restores my confidence a little bit.

Half way through my meal, a vendor, a woman, comes up to me and starts talking to me. I think she is trying to ask me why I am alone and if I am American. I motion for her to repeat what she says. I finally quip out (in Chinese): I am American. I am an English teacher in Fong Yuan...

She tries to continue...but my limited vocabulary finally lends her to say something like sorry for disrupting you, or it is okay (you cannot speak well...have a good dinner.) She motions for me to continue eating. I return back to my food and throw over my shoulder an "oh well" with a sigh.

I get out and walk out from the eating tables. I walk in a semi-disinterested gait looking at the merchandise. I look for a drink stand but I cannot find one. I am on my way out, but I forget where I am in the night market. I pass the same stands once again. Lost in the crowd. Then I am found. I hear my name. "Erin!" It is Joanne: Connie's language exchange. We chat for a bit. I find out that her brother is in the hospital with air in his lung. My heart skips a beat. Life is so fragile. But thankfully he will be out in two days. She bows out and leaves. I am lost again.

I find my scooter and ride on my way back home. I get out the traffic crowds and speed down towards my school. I am found again. Speeding. Free. This type of communication is clear to me. It is a communication with functionality and the elements; physics and torque. Wind, speed, acceleration drive my worries home but also put excitement into the aftertaste.

Lost and found. In a crowd. All alone. Where ever it may be. Who ever I may be. Tittering between being lost and found will keep me pushing to get past lost and start towards found.

Monday, January 19, 2009

Taiwan Love

Taiwan is like my second home. I have come to love it more than my own country. I still love my country but Taiwan will always hold a very special place in my heart. It has been my first love abroad. The only other foreign country I have been in is in Canada and I was there for less than two weeks. It was a good experience, but nothing like Taiwan. The thought of leaving Taiwan does not bring me joy. I have had a taste of something I very much like. I think I will cry when I leave it. Thank goodness I have a little less than 5 months left of Taiwan. There are so much places I still need to go to.

This Chinese New Year's I am going to see a little more of Taiwan. Taiwan has inspired the urge to travel everywhere in the world. It has opened my eyes to the options of my life. I never thought this is where my life would lead me, but I am lovin' it. Taiwan is probably one of the best things I have done bar none. My family would love to see me home again, but I don't want to go back. I just feel it would be the death of something inside of me. My Chinese language learning is going very slow, but it is crawling along. Despite that, I am very happy here.

Taiwan love. Forever.